Funny Jokes-Part-1

>>Q: What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his examination?
A: Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but I never told them anything
>> Best Breakup Letter EVER!!
A soldier stationed in Afghanistan recently received a letter from his
girlfriend back home. It read as follows:
Dear Ricky,
I can no longer continue our relationship. The distance between us is
just too great. I must admit that I have cheated on you twice, since
you've been gone, and it's not fair to either of us.
I'm sorry.
Please return the picture of me that I sent to you.
Love, Becky..............
The soldier, with hurt feelings, asked his fellow soldiers for any
snapshots they could spare of their girlfriends, sisters or
ex-girlfriends.
In addition to the picture of Becky, Ricky included all the other
pictures of the pretty gals he had collected from his buddies. There
were 57 photos in that envelope....along with this note:
Dear Becky,
I'm so sorry, but I can't quite remember who the hell you are.
Please take your picture from the pile, and send the rest back to me.
Take Care,






>>An Arab needed a heart transplant, but prior to the surgery the doctors needed to store his blood on standby. As the Arab had a very rare type of blood, it couldn't be found locally.
So the call went out to a number of countries. Finally, a Sindhi was located who had a similar type of blood.
The Sindhi willingly donated his blood for the Arab. After the surgery the Arab sent the Sindhi as a token of his appreciation a new Rolls, diamonds, Bulgari jewellery, and a million US dollars.
Once again the Arab had to go through a corrective surgery. His doctor telephoned the Sindhi who was more than happy to donate his blood again.
After the second surgery, the Arab sent the Sindhi a thank you card and a jar of almond halwa.
The Sindhi was shocked to see that the Arab this time did not reciprocate the Sindhi's kind gesture as he had anticipated. He phoned the Arab and asked him why he had expressed his appreciation in not so generous manner.
The Arab replied "Chariya...now I have Sindhi blood in my veins !"







>>Shortest Story
Jack participated in a competition for writing the shortest story. The organizers had put a condition that the story must have four ingredients i.e.religion, sex, suspense and mystery.
Jack's turn came after many attempts by others. Jack read out his story, which comprised just one sentence:
"Oh god, my wife is going to deliver a child".
Ostensibly amused, the organizers asked Jack to explain how it contained all the four ingredients.
Jack gave his explanation; " Religion is denoted by the words Oh God. "My wife" refers to sex. And "going to deliver a child" indicates suspense - whether a girl or a boy."
Amused one of the organizers asked; "Okay.... but where is the
mystery?"
Jack replied. " Don't you see. There is no mention who is the father?"







>>An Honest Parrot
A woman went to a pet shop and immediately spotted a large beautiful parrot. There was a sign on the cage that said £50.00.
"Why so little," she asked the pet store owner. The owner looked at her and said, "Look, I should tell you first that this bird used to live in a house of prostitution, and sometimes it says some pretty vulgar stuff."
The woman thought about this, but decided she had to have the bird anyway. She took it home and hung the bird's cage up in her living room and waited for it to say something. The bird looked around the room, then at her, and said, "New house, new madam." The woman was a bit shocked at the implication, but then thought "that's not so bad." When her two teenage daughters returned from school the bird saw them and said, "New house, new madam, new girls."
The girls and the woman were a bit offended but then began to laugh about the situation. Moments later, the woman's husband Alex, came home from work.
The bird looked at him and said, "Hi Alex".